I think the greatest myth when it comes to grief

is that time heals all things.

It does not.

Grief is a process that we have to work our way through.

We have to engage ourselves in that process, expressing our grief

in a way that is natural and congruent to how we feel.

This is, I believe, where the healing process begins –

where we learn to honour our loss, create meaning out of it and

embrace what life has yet to offer.

At some point or other, grief will be a part of our life experience.

None of us are exempt from experiencing loss and

the feelings of grief that will naturally follow.

How we grieve is individual.

We can’t ignore it or run away from it.

We grieve because we first loved.

Grief is an expression of our love.

Allow it.

Honour it.

Understand it.

And seek to create meaning out of it.

 

© Julie Ann Bryant 2013

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This poem, as it appears on my webpage, has also been saved to the Internet Archive Wayback Machine.
 
 

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This poem first appeared in my book, From One Twin Mum To Another (2022), page 27. Here is my back-story to this poem …

October is recognised around the world as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, and many online events are held throughout the month. A number of years ago, I wrote this poem as my own personal way of participating in this meaningful event.